Mistakes parents make

We had a really good discussion this morning in our youth ministry. The topic was areas of conflict that parents have with teens and teens have with parents. Here are a few of the things the teens shared as conflicts:

• clothes
• money
• rules
• make up (for the girls, thankfully)
• attitudes

Of course the list could go on much longer but I am writing just a few of the things. What we focused on even more was how to handle ourselves as parents or teens when it comes to conflict.

Sadly, when people are in conflict they become highly emotional. During that emotional state some pretty damaging things can be said. Things that can impact relationships for a long, long time.

I think that we as parents need to admit that sometimes we are wrong. Not all the time but certainly some of the time. We need to be willing to listen to our teens and hear them out. One way to get a teen to stop talking, is to always have to be right.

I am not saying that teens are always right either, because they are not. They cannot see things from a long term perspective. They can't always predict that the choices they make now may have a huge impact on their lives in the future. I hope that we can help our teens to understand this without getting into a screaming match.

I think this is important to talk about because too many teens are feeling disconnected from their parents. So much damage is done from a few misguided words spoken in the heat "of the battle". I know I can do better and maybe you can too!!!

Let us choose to love first, listen second and speak third. Love will always prevail. A few words spoken in love goes a long way. A damaging word spoken in rage goes on and on and on...

It is not always easy

Our first night out to feed the homeless in our city was a huge success and we didn't even feed any homeless people. That might seem like a strange thing to say, but it really was. Here is why:

• it was freezing cold, and we had eight people who willingly spent two hours serving the Lord with their presence
• we all came away with an understanding of how blessed we are to have a warm place to sleep
• we were able to let some people know where we would be every Tuesday and Friday night
• we saw how much a cup of hot chocolate and a warm bowl of soup can really take away the deep cold in a body, as we all shared together
• we had an amazing prayer time for those in our city. To be able to gather together in freezing weather, and spend 20+ minutes just interceding for those less fortunate was special
• we understood how desperate those who live on the streets must be, we were forced to think how scary it must be to live like this
• we had two teenagers that could have been warm and comfortable in their homes that spent two hours in freezing cold weather, willing to serve their peers

Our target group is teens. As I watched these girls, Virginia and Missy shiver and not give up, I was blessed. As a youth pastor I love to see young servants of the Lord. I was so proud of them, but more importantly I know the Lord was. He knows their hearts.

I am truly excited for what God has in store for this type of ministry. I am grateful that we started with a truly challenging night. We will always be able to look back and say "we remember the first night of ministry, it was freezing cold, high winds, and no one came for food. It was awesome!!!"

What a blessing to serve God. It is not always easy, it wasn't supposed to be.

It is a cold windy day

It is such a cold and windy day, very blustery, white out kind of weather. I can hear the wind whistling outside. The good news this is our first night to go out and feed those in need.

The easiest thing to do tonight would be to say that we are going to cancel, but there is no way I am going to do that. Why? Because it will help us to begin to understand what people who have to live outside go through. It can't be easy for them.

We will all need to bundle up, where some extra layers of clothing and pray. I look forward to helping a brother or sister in need. I know I can go home after midnight tonight, but where will they go? How are they keeping warm in this freezing weather? How about those teens and children we will meet, how are they going to survive? These are important questions we need to find answers to.

You will see some of our divine appointments shared in this blog over the next few days. We hope to have some pictures and videos for you. We are not doing this to "put on a show", we are doing this to bring true attention to those who struggle to survive on days like today and beyond.

Please remember to pray for us tonight from 10 til midnight.

Ready to begin

It is almost upon us. No I am not talking about the Superbowl or the Olympics, though I am a big fan of both. I am no talking about the weekend, though I must say I do enjoy Saturday's. I am talking about something even bigger than all those things.

Tomorrow night Boaz Ministry will begin its very first outreach. We are going to be set up downtown from 10 pm to midnight, handing out food to those in need of a warm meal on a cold night. How many meals will we serve tomorrow night, I don't know. Even if we can feed just one it will be worth it. The truth is I am sure we will be feeding more than just one.

Our ministry is focused on reaching teens in need. We know that tomorrow night we will feed others in need who are not teens. We will not ask the people to show ID's in order to give them a warm meal. We will though really try to focus in on those between 15-19 that we do meet.

Ministry is really all about building relationships and building trust with people. It takes time and it takes consistency. We trust that by being faithful to be in the same spot two nights a week, and meeting a practical need, that we can find ourselves connecting with those who need a friend. We will be willing to listen and encourage.

Pray for our team as we minister to our city. Pray that we connect with those who need us and more importantly need God. Our goal is not to shove God down peoples throats, it is to show them Christ's love at the same time as we help them get something warm in their bellies.

If you ever want to join us, let me know. We are open to your hearts of service too.

Problem in almost every country

According to UNICEF recent numbers, the number of orphans worldwide is between 143 million and 200 million children. These numbers are sad. That doesn't include those who are 16,17 and 18.

But what happens when these children become teens? What happens when they "age out"? What happens when they turn 15 and they have no where to go. Let me share some more statistics.

In Russia and the Ukraine, studies have shown that 10% – 15% of these children commit sucide before they reach age eighteen

These studies also show that 60% of the girls become prostitutes and 70%of the boys become hardened criminals

Another Russian study reported that of the 15,000 orphans aging out of state-run institutions every year, 1,500 committed suicide, 5,000 were unemployed, 6,000 were homeless and 3,000 were in prison within three years…

Teens at age 15 are clearly not ready to be out on their own and trying to "survive". Look at those statistics above, 15,000 teens age out at 15 and within three years, up to 10,500 of them either committed suicide, were homeless or were in prison. That means that two of every three kids coming out of orphanages are in for a horrible existence.

As I continue to watch Haiti unfold the reports say the same thing. Even kids in this country age out at 15 and have no where to go. Who will take care of them, who will be a father to the fatherless? We need to do whatever we can as a ministry, focusing on these teens around the world and here at home. Make no mistake, this age group is neglected here in Canada.

My prayer for Boaz Ministry is that we would never lose the focus of what this ministry is to be about. We are to focus on teens between the age of 15 and 19. They need people to come alongside of them, teach them, love them and care for them. They are not prepared to enter the world at their age. If we can invest in them, hopefully the people we minister to will have a much higher success rate than they have had in other countries.

Sex slave and children

I am very aware that there still exists a problem in our world that needs to be addresses when it comes to children, especially those children who live in "poorer" countries. Unfortunately and disgustingly there are those that would seek to adopt children or "help to get them out of the country" in order to exploit them..

An organization called "Not For Sale" are a leading organization in awareness of this worldwide problem. Make no mistake it takes place in the US and in Canada. Children are brought here under the guise of adoption and then are placed into forced labor or the sex trade.

Why do I share this? Here is a quote from Haiti, " a suspicious man on the hospital grounds was removed several days ago. We are convinced he was trying to steal a child. The fear is the children could be trafficked, stolen for illegal adoptions, sexually exploited or sold as domestic servants. We as Christians need to pray that the children being adopted from Haiti and other countries are adopted by people who truly love them. We need to be aware so we can have eyes to see situations that are not right. I am not calling into question people who are legitimate adoptive parents, because they are such a blessing.

Child trafficking needs to be stopped. Lets keep our hearts in prayer for the many orphans in need. Pray that those who have an improper agenda would be exposed and shut down. Lord protect those in need and make away for those trapped in bondage by evil people to be set free.

If we ever have reason to believe a child/teen is being sexually exploited or being forced into an illegal working environment, lets have the courage to stand up for those who seem to have no voice.

Words of encouragement

One of my favorite people in the world is Sonya Land. Sonya is a precious friend that lives in Alabama. She and her husband Richard lost almost everything in hurricane Katrina. A few short months later her husband was murdered in a senseless burglary gone wrong. He was murdered by a 15 year old boy.

I was blessed to have Sonya come to Fredericton a year and a half ago and she shared with the teens of our youth ministry. She talked about love and forgiveness and hope in the middle of dark times. She was and is such an inspiration.

She would have many reasons to be mad at God and mad at the world. Not Sonya. She loves the Lord and continues to be used by God to bring hope and encouragement. She did it again today!!!

She learned of an initiative being undertaken by one of our teens to reach out to people in need. She wrote to encourage this teen as well as other teens in Fredericton, and told them how proud she was of them. I know everyone that read her comments, that truly knows Sonya had a smile on their face. Why? Because they know she is a genuine person and a true encourager.

I think there are times when we think we can go through the motions when we "encourage people". We say things like "good luck" and that is supposed to be encouraging? What if we said things like," I believe in you", or" you are special and we are proud of you" or "I know you can do that with God's help".

The reality is this: Our words are powerful. When a person with integrity speaks, I want to listen. I am encouraged by them. I want to be around them.

If people don't want to be around you, take a few minutes and consider the words you say, the look on your face and whether or not you are an encourager or discourager.

Thanks Sonya for being an encourager!!!

Boaz is His!!!

The more I share the vision for the Boaz ministry the more I am reminded that it is God that will build this ministry. Why do I say this? Because I believe we are allowing God to lead us. I can take no credit for anything in this ministry other than sharing the vision and having a passion for the heart of God.

I had an opportunity to share Boaz with a couple this weekend. They asked me how Boaz came to be and the more I share this, the more it becomes clear. It was God's prompting, followed by His prophetic confirmation, followed by His vision, followed by His people and being built by His provision. Boaz is His!!!

What a blessing to be given the leadership position in this ministry. My desire is to clearly hear from Him and follow His prompting. He will provide.

Just in the last few days we have been given a pool table, two televisions, a microwave, food and another donation of $360.00. The truth is I never asked for any of it, God has provided it all. I have asked Him to provide and lay this ministry on others hearts.

We have a property we have looked at and it would be great for this ministry. The price is $240,000. Is it for Boaz, I really believe it is!!! How will He provide for it? I am not sure yet. But I am confident of this, if this home is for us, His provision will be there.

I make this declaration not because of me, but because of Him. I am blessed because of Him and Him alone. Thank you Lord!!!

No compassion

Yesterday we went to visit a local store here in town to share our vision is for reaching out to the down and out teens of our city. The reaction we got was indicative of the way some people feel about teens. I understand based on his experience why he felt like he did, I just have a different opinion.

The man we talked to said he had no interest in helping with this type of ministry because the people we are helping are just lazy. When we explained we are targeting teenagers he was even more upset. He said they are even worse not only are they lazy but they are thieves. Needless to say, he has no interest in what we are doing and thinks we are wasting our time.

That is often the way the world looks at things. They tend to lump everyone and everything together, mostly as bad. That is not the way God looks at us. The reality is no one was ever born that way, right out of the womb they being trouble makers. Most times our background, our history, things we have gone through, models we have had in front us determine what we become.

I also know this, people are redeemable. They have value. The ones who are the most hardened, even at their young age can change. If they are loved, accepted and treated with respect. If they are given guidelines and someone is willing to hold them to it, they can change. How do I know that?

Because God can change people. He changed you and me!!! He is in the miracle business. He loves the poor, the broken, the abused and the oppressed.

If you ever read the New Testament you know he changes lives. Look at Paul, he lived to kill Christians. He hated them. He despised them. God had a different plan for his life. He has a different plan for those at risk teens and children and their families too. Where there is hate God can bring love. Where there has been abuse God can bring healing. Where there is hopelessness God can bring life.

No matter what others may say about this ministry or those we will minister to, I believe God wants to bring change.

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It is really that simple.

Orphans in Haiti

There were 380,000 orphans before the earthquake. Today there are so many more and they are hurting. The orphans cannot take care of themselves, they need people to take care of them.

It is heart breaking to hear the reports out of Haiti. The tiny little children do not have formula, diapers, baby wipes or any other of the necessities that they need. The caregivers cannot get access to food and water.

Jesus loves the little children, all the children of the world. He has told us as His followers that we are to be his hands and feet to the world. Lets make a difference. We need to love those less fortunate.

I am starting a campaign to gather formula and diapers and baby wipes. Lets together impact those who cannot help themselves. How will we get the supplies there? I do not have that answer right now, but I am confident that God will supply the connections as well as the funds to make it happen.

I hope you are interested.

I am encouraged

We had a great day, it was a blessed day. Did you know that if you live in North America that you are blessed everyday. You and I may go through trials but we are truly blessed.

Haiti continues to need our help. Let me share a couple of ways people are making a difference:

Anna a girl in our youth group has started a ministry called "Haiti's Tooth Fairies". She is going to go out and raise awareness and collect toothbrushes and toothpaste to send to Haiti.

Scott a boy in our youth group is going door to door collecting tents and clothing to send to Haiti. I love their initiative.

Tonight we had a wonderful city wide prayer meeting for Haiti. It was a very emotional night and powerful as close to 70 of us gathered to intercede for Haiti. We prayed specifically for the rescue workers, nurses, doctors, police, soldiers and all others helping out. We prayed for those that are injured whether it be physically, psychologically, emotionally. We prayed for healing for nation not only for today but in the future.

One area that really touched our hearts, and we prayed specifically for are the orphans of Haiti. The number of orphans in Haiti has gone up significantly over the last week. One lady at the prayer service thanked God that he was a "father to the fatherless". That really spoke to me.

Those of course were the same words that God has been speaking to my heart over the last year. I am so glad that I have been able to launch this ministry which will take care of orphans in their distress.

Pray for this ministry that God's provision will be poured out on it. I look forward to Boaz making a difference here in Canada, and I look forward to Boaz Ministries building homes for children around the globe.

I am blessed, grateful and encouraged by God. I hope you are too.

Prayer service

Boaz Ministry is hosting a prayer service at First Wesleyan Church tomorrow night, Sunday the 17th at 6:30. We will be praying for the people of Haiti and to further seek God's vision on how we can impact their lives.

Please plan to attend and invite others too.

Lord Bless the people of Haiti and meet the needs of the people. You are a big God and we call on you.

Haiti...miracles

God pour out your love and protection on those suffering in Haiti. I know you love those in Haiti as much as you love us. You know their desperation, they need mighty miracles.

I am humbled as I watch what is happening. I know at some point down the road we need to open up a home for teens/children that have been made orphans. God would you lead us and guide us in every aspect of this ministry.

This ministry is yours, I want to honor you in all we do.

Give wisdom Lord to those ministering in Haiti. Help them to know how to get supplies out quickly to those in need. Help them to recover those buried in the rubble. I pray for a girl named Alexandra tonight in Petionville. I do not know who she is but I know she needs help right now.

Pray for Haiti

The pictures we see are horrible and are very sad. Let's remember that a picture captures an image in one small area. The problem is huge. Haiti is in desperate need of help.

It is time for the Christian community to rise up and make an impact. Lets get at it. Let us all fall on our knees, asking God how we can make a difference. Give generously, serve wholeheartedly.

The Word of God tells us in 1 John 3, that we are to love one another. It tells us to give to our brothers and sisters in need. It says when we see those in need of our help, and we have the resources to do something about it, and do nothing, then how can the love of God be in us. That is a question we need to reflect on.

Haiti is not someone elses problem. It is ours too!!! Why because they are our brothers and sisters. Boaz needs to do something to make a difference.

A miracle of healing

Today I was honored to meet Ryan, a young man who is going to community college in Fredericton. He is 19 and a very respectable person. I grew up and played hockey with his dad.

Last year my mother in law was diagnosed with cancer and began chemotherapy. One day when I was in with her at the hospital I ran into Ryan. Ryan was just about ready to begin university the previous September when it was discovered that he had cancer. Ryan had been in chemo for a few months, when my mother in law was there.

I talked to Ryan when he was in for his treatments and had our youth group pray for him often. I had often wondered how he was doing, I knew he was very sick when I last saw him. I know that we along with many others prayed for a miracle in his life.

Praise God, today Ryan is cancer free. The doctors gave him a 5-10% chance of survival. One day Ryan went in for tests to see where the cancer had spread and the doctors were in for a surprise. The cancer was gone. The doctor could not explain what happened, but Ryan could, he knew it was a miracle of God.

I was so blessed to see Ryan today. I rejoice with him and his family that he was healed, Ryan said something to me that continues to play in my mind. He said, "when you go through hard times people watch to see how you handle yourself." Pretty wise words for a person who was eighteen when he was fighting for his life.

Brothers and sisters, how are we handling ourselves? Is God honored when He sees what we do and how we treat others? Is God honored with how we treat our family?

I think I can learn a lot from a young man who carries himself so well. Thank you Ryan for impacting my life.

Benefit concert

Mark this on your calendars. There will be a benefit concert on Jan 23rd in the evening with 60% of the proceeds from the night going to Boaz ministry. I am very excited to be able to share the ministry with some new folks in the area.

I will be interviewed a couple of times on one of the local radio stations over the next two weeks as we lead into the benefit concert. This will be beneficial to getting more information to people about how we want to impact our city and those at risk.

We have just completed a new tri-fold brochure that shares the ministry and the vision for Boaz. I look forward to getting this out to those who I am talking to about our goals. Special thanks to Cathy who put it together.

The house on George St. remains on the market. We are taking a walk through this week with some of our board members and advisory board. I continue to pray for someone to come forward and purchase a home for the ministry. I have faith that God can meet this need. To us it may seem big but to God it is very possible.

I recognize that this is God's ministry and we are simply His hands and feet.

Facing the Giants

Last night our youth ministry watched the movie "Facing the Giants". For those who have not watched it yet, I recommend it. It is a story about one man who is facing gigantic challenges. In one day his vehicle breaks down, his job is threatened, he feels very insecure and he is unable to provide for his family. He was in a desperate place.

In his state of great anxiety, unable to sleep, he goes for a walk. As he makes his way to a field he pleads with God to intervene. He pours out his desperation to God. He had reached the end of his strength and ability to cope.

I could relate to this man. I have had so many days in the past where I have gone to a quiet place and poured out my heart to God. I mean poured out. Gut wrenching, deep emotional pain poured out. It was not a fun place to be.

The Boaz Ministry is going to deal with people that feel desperate, people who have no where else to turn. No where to turn but God for help. That is where God will always be found. When we are serious and willing to let Him intervene, He will be there. The reality is He is always there, just waiting for us to call out to Him.

God answers prayer! He has done it so many times in my life. There have been situations where without God's intervention I would have surely fallen flat on my face. My life would have been radically changed in negative ways if He had not sustained me and brought about miracles.

Whatever Giant you face in your life remember this: God is bigger than any giant. With God nothing is impossible. If it is a financial need, God has provision. If it is worry, God brings counsel. If it is a family need, God is a kinsman redeemer. If it is a physical need, God is our healer. No matter what you deal with, He is the answer.

So what will you do with your problems? Carry them around all day and feel overwhelmed? I have a better solution, take them to God and lay them at his feet!!!

Separated shoulder

I am watching the Canada / USA hockey game. I am not playing, I am cheering but I can only watch. Thats all I can do to help.

There is a player for Team Canada that got injured when he separated his in the last game. He is sitting on the bench watching and cheering but not playing. he can't. The announcer said, "can you imagine how he must feel, he must feel awful." The reality is, he probably does. But it also got me thinking about something else.

How many kids/teens would love to participate in activities but can't because they have no one to drive them to the rink, they can't afford to take part because mom or dad doesn't have the resources. Maybe they have been denied opportunities because mom or dad would rather spend their money on alcohol and drugs or even cigarettes instead of giving their child just a chance to do what other kids are allowed to do.

As bad as I feel for the hockey player on team Canada (I really don't feel all that bad,. I feel much more concerned for the teen that never gets to live with their family, never is included when others are doing things and always has to make excuses for why he or she can't do something.

Thats my perspective. Other than that I am going to enjoy the rest of the game. Go Canada Go!!

Did I do the right thing?

I received a phone call on Saturday from a concerned Christian teen. She expressed to me that she had just received a text message from another teen she knows. The gist of the message she received was that her friend had been threatened by another teen and that this teen was afraid for their life.

I was so proud of this young lady that called me to let me know what was happening. She said "I didn't know what to do to help, but I knew that you would know what to do." That takes courage. In a world where teens are taught to mind their own business she got involved.

I was able to reach the threatened teen and determined where the threat had originated from. I was ensured by the threatened teen that he would seek help from the proper people if things got worse. He promised to do so.

On Saturday afternoon I was watching CNN and they were doing an interview with teens in Atlanta. They asked them if they would get involved in helping someone that was being beaten up, or was being gang raped. Surprisingly they all said that they would NOT try and help. The reason, because then they might get in trouble. They might then have a target on their back. That is so sad. So what is the solution if other teens do not want to get involved?

Might I suggest, that we need to get involved. When I say we, I mean the faith community. I mean concerned adults. I mean you and I.

I just finished watching another video that involved church leaders in Chicago. They made the statement that faith groups have a great responsibility to impact their communities, to help stop violence amongst teens. Amen to that!!

They were also asked why there was so much violence for teens these days. Many opinions were expressed. All were valid because you can't boil the problem down to a simple solution. They did all agree on one thing. All four men, muslim, catholic and two baptists agreed the biggest single reason for violence among teens is a disconnect from God. Did you catch that? A disconnect from God.

Brothers and sisters if we are to truly help teens deal with things that bother them in a positive way it involves helping them reconnect with God. You and I both know that schools will not allow for this. We as a faith community and an organization must be proactive in helping teens. It is our responsibility.

Back to the question the young girl asked, did she do the right thing? Absolutely 100% YES!!